My Wild Fantasies
Music was my thing ever since I was a little girl. However, I never pursued it as much because I had a lot of work to do at school and my parents expected much of me. That does not mean that I never considered music as a source of livelihood. I would write songs during my free time and I would make some pennies selling them, if my clients felt that they were good- it was much like gambling. That didn’t deter me though. It was much of a side hustle, thus I had nothing to lose.
When I joined college, I continued to write and practice a few lines whenever I was free. I would fantasize about making it ‘big’ in music but I usually doubted myself. During one of my solo performances in the inter-colleges music festival, all my doubts faded. I met Davis, who was a judge at the event and also a professor in music. He must have been thrilled by my performance because he promised to hook me with a recording label so that I could try my luck- something which he did.
When, I was introduced to the manager of the label, I was much overwhelmed and since he wanted to see my ability, I concentrated much in try to compose songs which would entice the music production label. I did all this at the expense of my class work didn’t realize it until end of semester exams were almost to commence.
Having not prepared adequately for my exams, I knew that my parents would be disappointed in me if I got bad grades. I didn’t want this to happen and therefore the last resort to ensure good grades was to cheat in the exams. That was a mistake that I did. I planned the best way to cheat during all the papers that I hadn’t prepared well. During the exams, I tried all means to ‘pass’ and the first papers went well without much fuss. This wasn’t with the third paper, because the invigilator caught me in the ‘act’. I pleaded with her to forgive me because I knew the dire consequences which awaited me, she was reluctant. I tried to convince her to let me reseat the paper but she was still adamant and she ended up reporting to the school administration.
Upon a series of events which followed saw me suspended from the school for two years. This was not only devastating to me but also to my parents. I had really failed them. There was nothing that they were ready to hear from me.
More Devastating Woes
I had forgotten much about the songs that I had written; partly because of what had happened at school, and also because my parent would not hear of it. However, after the first month at home, I decided to contact the manager of the production house. He was glad that I called him and explained to me how he had tried to reach me unsuccessful. He requested me to meet him because he wanted me to record a song with his studio.
I felt that I desperately needed to prove to my parents that I wasn’t such a worthless bitch as my dad had called me. Therefore I sneaked from home that afternoon and went to meet him. We talked a lot about my songs and he was willing to let me record two of my songs that he considered would be a hit. This really excited me. The excitement was short-lived, when he requested for the recording fees- a thing I couldn’t afford.
He was quick to comfort me and told me that he would help me record the songs for free provided we strike a deal about the sharing of revenue if the songs made well. Part of the deal also was for me to make love to him. I detested this vehemently but I really needed to have the songs produced.
I told him to give me time to think about it. After three days, I was with him in a hotel and we had sex. However, he didn’t keep part of his bargain and every time that I called him, he would hung up the phone. He also had me restricted from his office.
I then missed my periods. A pregnancy test came out positive. I couldn’t believe that I had lost both the heavens and the earth. I came to realize that my naivety had given me the bitter taste of the world.